What Up With...My First Kiss

For "What Up With That" Wednesday, I ask you: What up with "My First Kiss" by 3OH!3? More specifically, what up with my not being able to get this song out of my head? If you haven't turned on your radio lately, give it a listen:

I was in my dance class the first time I heard this song. It was bouncy and good to dance to, but I didn't think anything of it except "wow, Ke$ha is on ANOTHER song". I didn't hear it again for a few weeks until I went out of town and it was playing on every single radio station. I was annoyed. What were they talking about? My first kiss didn't go like "muah and twist". Maybe there was a little twist since I tried to get away. But it was definitely without the clapping and bouncy music.

But the more I heard it, the more I started to think it was ok. Then it was good. And now I can't get enough of it. I rock out to it at the gym and I totally sing along to it in my car to the embarrassment of my husband (especially when it get to the oooooo part. he promptly changes the channel). The song doesn't mesh with the Jack's Mannequin and Get Up Kids that's currently on heavy rotation on my ipod, but I don't care.

I tried to fight it, but "My First Kiss" I hate you...for making me love you.

Love,

Betty

Emily Post and I hate you

I hate people who decide to cross the street when they don't have the right of way and then leisurely stroll along holding up traffic. For that matter people who honk at you to drive when the sign clearly says "no turn on red", I hate you too. If you would like to pay my red light ticket, go right ahead but until then sit there and shut up. Green means go, not the sound of your horn.

I hate people who cut in lines. Who complain about the bagger to their face while on their cell phone. Who come into the 10 items or less lane with 15 or more items and think it's fine. One or two items I can understand but five or more? And then you don't know where you money is. And you're still on the cell phone.

Oh and people who have NO idea what they're doing in self checkout. I get you want to be adventurous or are trying to avoid the long lines but please don't. Your lack of skill and the huge grocery cart of things just holds the rest of us up who only have wine, shampoo, and dog treats {total single girl purchase}.

For that matter, people who get into the expert travelers lane at airports when they have no place being there. I am not going to lie, I judge you while you fumble with you shoes, go slow, and think you have all the time in the world. {Sorry Dad but you take WAY to long with your shoes and belt}. When I hit the line, my flip flips are off, bag ready, nothing in my pockets, and ticket in hand. That's why it's called expert.

When I hold open the door for you? A nod, a 'thank you', a smile, any acknowledgment that we are two people in life worthy of respect? that would be nice. If we are crossing paths, don't walk right into me. At least try to move and I'm pretty sure an "excuse me" wouldn't kill you. When I'm in line, how about some space? Unless you're Eric Northman, I don't think I want my body touching yours.

People who lack manners and common courtesy? I hate you.

Love,

Veronica.

mtv, i hate you

Dear Mtv,

I hate you. I literally hate you with a burning anger in my chest. What you did with the voting was ridiculous and I'm pretty sure rigged. Please explain to me how the girl with the top votes and tweets and the biggest heart didn't make it into the final 5?

This is a contest for a twitter tj right? So you would think you would want the person who actually tweets the most, with actual content, replies to every comment made to her, AND ACTUALLY FOLLOWS HER FOLLOWERS would be the top candidate and who you want to win.

I hate that we had to jump through hoops to even vote and that LiLu did so much and yet somehow, your number 1 is a person who doesn't even follow her followers or seem to care.

But seriously, I really need you to explain the situation and why you even made tweet levels so important if you then ignored it. You were obviously smart to pick LiLu in the first place, so what gives?

I don't want my Mtv and I won't be watching.

Teen Mom, you will be missed.

The only way you can redeem yourself Mtv is if you didn't want LiLu to win because you're giving her her own tv show. Then all will be forgiven.

Until then I hate you.

Veronica.

Dear Lilu,

We all love you and know you're amazing and no matter what, you're a success. Guest spot on Community? If we can all tweet to get you on mtv which clearly sucks, let's get you on what matters!!

You have the biggest and best heart. You are a funny and kind and amazing person and we all love you and are proud!

Love

Veronica


Dear MTV,

I hate you. When I was 5 years old and my parents got cable, I wasn't excited about Nickelodeon. I was excited about MTV. Of course it was forbidden in my house, so I would wake up extra early in the morning when they were still in bed and watch it with the volume low. I would throw on my ballet leotards and pretend that I was Madonna mouthing the words to "Like a Virgin" without knowing what it really meant. I loved your network and I was a devoted fan for many years.

Over the years, I really don't know what's happened to MTV. When the M stands for "music", I want to know why I have to wait until midnight to see a music video but you constantly air shows like "silent library" which have NOTHING to do with music. It came to the point that when I switched cable providers, I didn't even know what number your channel was on because you had nothing I wanted to watch. When this competition started, I felt like you were finally doing something worthwhile and I started watching again...but you failed.

Lilu was a girl who gave her ALL to this contest. She was consistently in the top 3 if not in the top spot for the entire contest. You claimed that the top 4 would make it to the final competition. And now people with lower twitter levels made it into the top 5...um...wth? (not that I have anything against those people since I don't know them) But really, what happened to following the rules? Or if we're all wrong about the rules, how about you make them clearer? Because none of us can understand what happened. When your main viewers are teenagers, you should teach and promote honesty and fairness. I don't think you did that here.

Obviously this is your loss. Losing me as a viewer may have little impact, but losing Lilu is the biggest mistake you've ever made. MTV, today our relationship has to end. It's not me - it's you.

Love,

Betty

********************

Check out #reasonsmtvsucks from Rachel / @mominreallife

• #reasonsmtvsucks they are one full frontal "slip up" from being porn.
• #reasonsmtvsucks Can anyone remember the last time the network actually did good for the world instead of bringing it down to it's level?
• Remember that kid that ate paste in your 1st grade class? Yeah he's the president of @MTV now...
• #reasonsmtvsucks My dog eats shit, pukes, and licks her ass. Apparently she could have her own show on @mtv
• #reasonsmtvsucks apparently their ranking of "talent" is based off of how many STDs you can catch
• #reasonsmtvsucks if 20somethings weren't willing to get wasted in front of a camera they wouldn't have anything to put on TV

Whats up with ScarJo?

Scarlett Johansson?
I hate you.

No, it's not because you married the talented and funny Ryan Reynolds which seems totally undeserved when I think of all the moronic things to come out of your mouth.

It's not because of your stupidly placed tattoo.

So why do I hate you? Yeah...okay...it's definitely all the stupid things that come out of your mouth that are both negative towards women, contradictory, and catered to the ideal of female sexuality as constructed by males....

“I definitely believe in plastic surgery. I don't want to be an old hag. There's no fun in that.”

Have you called up Hellen Mirren and told her that? Because I don't know if you're aware of her last photo shoot. She might be old but she is no hag and a natural beauty. Since aging is an inevitable process it's nice to see people embracing what we're supposed to look like

“I hope they make a video game of me. At least I wouldn't have any cellulite then.”

Again worried about your looks. While I get your job depends on looks, at least how you portray yourself and the roles you go for, ever thought of how stupid you sound when you say that and then say things like...

“If you're comfortable with yourself, then it's sexy. Maybe people think I look sexy because I feel sexy. I am a very liberated person that way. I'm very comfortable with my sexuality, my body, my face - well, sometimes I'm not comfortable with my face, but it's stuck there and there's nothing I can do about it.”

Right. You're comfortable with your sexuality except for looking old and any body imperfections. I actually don't find you liberated at all. I also like how only the things that you like are the things that males value sexually and the reason they see your movies, your body and breasts. Of course your face, which makes you unique, is what you don't like.

"Of course it's nice to be considered sexy, as a young woman in my prime. But I try not to think about the sexiness. And I never think about it being distracting."

You try not think about it but you always talk about it. Annoying. Also, it's not distracting?

"I was driving through Los Angeles and I look up and see the biggest photo of me I have ever seen in my life on a massive ad space. I screamed and slammed on the brakes. I couldn't believe it. It's very strange to see my cleavage the size of a brontosaurus. My breasts were huge. I had long hair and my goodness, I couldn't get past the cleavage."

okay...and? google yourself and thats all you see because thats all you show.

and my fav?

"I think that I sort of see other actresses are kind of proud of the way they look and show it off. That`s never really been my style. I really don`t think that it`s disgusting or wrong, if you`re 18 you`re 18, it`s your body, it`s your right to show yourself, however, I don`t really take a part in that. I like to look nice, but I think that there`s ways of doing it that are more tasteful than just wearing a bikini wherever you go. "

Oh how times change. I don't think there's a movie or awards show when your breasts aren't hanging out or being squeezed til they hit your face. As Betty pointed out, you being a skinny girl with big breasts is okay but being curvy like Christina Hendricks (from Mad Men) and having large breasts {read: normal and sexy} is someone disgusting. Don't fool yourself, you have some curves but you're a skinny girl with big breasts. I really see no problem wearing a bikini to the beach if you're 18, so please show me who does that atthe parties and places you go?

ScarJo, you have annoyed me in all your roles except for Ghost World, which was awesome {whats up thora birch? rip brad renfro :( }, I hated you in "He's Just Not That Into You", and I am sick of every interview/time I see you/you open your mouth there is always some stupid quote about your sexuality. Don't get me started on your views on monogamy...

I don't like that you think you're so sexually liberated but work and promote and perpetuate the industry standards of beautiful and sexy. I feel bad that you don't like you face. I think you recognize that it is a game but you embrace it and continue it and that makes me sad. I don't like you and the control you perceive to have over your sexuality. You say things like, "Being ultra-thin is not sexy at all. Women shouldn't be forced to conform to unrealistic and unhealthy body images that the media promote." but then you go on about how you take anti aging products, hate you face, and how a women's best compliment is being called sexy.

I don't think so. My best compliment is when someone recognized my intelligence or humor or things that I can control

Beauty is an accident. What you are inside is a choice.

So ScarJo? I hate you.

Love,

Veronica

{edit: I am not against plastic surgery, anti aging, botox, make up, etc etc. I really just don't like the message that sexuality is about looks and being perfect. However a person is comfortable is fine with me but do realize that without the media, most people wouldn't be clamoring for the physical perfection they crave. What a person finds sexy is subjective and these are just my opinions on an actress I really don't like. Again, hate is just a strong word for dislike}

Pessimist Pete's, I hate you

I hate bad hair days, stubbing my toes, and negative people.

When something bad happens, I like to be witty, bitchy, silly and laugh it off. So when I see people bitching and moaning over useless things without a shed of positivity, it really annoys me. Sometimes bad things just happen. Sometimes you have car problems, spill on your favorite shirt, don't get a job you want, etc.

Sometimes your city makes you pay $75 for a sticker and then another $25 for your zone which they don't tell you in their renewal letter and you go with a $100, some meant to be gas money and they add on a $5.50 fee and you're all wtf? and they don't let you split payments with cash and credit and it becomes a hot mess and then your check engine light comes on a week after you just spent $60 to have it looked at and fixed...

I hate when people can never see the bright side or just remember tomorrow is another day. I hate having friends who just continually complain. If every conversation we have is about all the things wrong in your life and all 'woe is me', I will eventually stop calling you after I try slapping some sunshine into you and pumping some positivity into your complaint filed lungs.

Case in point: I had a good friend from high school who I always talked to and we got along very well until she got engaged. Now we had never agreed on many things but that was okay because agreement does not make a friendship. So when she got engaged she did not. stop. bitching. I'm sorry but if you're mom is paying for your too expensive wedding and you're only allowed 5 friends out of 75 guests, that's your own fault. I don't care about trolleys and overpriced wedding gowns and the fact that your wedding is black tie and only serving chicken or fish? redic. Black tie= steak. Eventually she complained about so much, I just stopped answering the calls. If she had even acted a little bit thankful someone was going to pay for a wedding which most people would be grateful for, I would have had some sympathy.

I have had friends, co-workers, family, and randoms on the train be that annoying negative person. I have been that person when I worked at a soul sucking job which drained my happiness. {When I realized I was being a grouch, I quit and went back to school.}

I just can't take another person bitching without anything positive being said. Also, do you think people really care about your every little problem? They really don't. You just come off spoiled and self absorbed and immature. It also just looks pathetic. A few complaints or a blog/tweet/phone call bitching about a bad day/week is completely understandable but when it becomes how people recognize you? Not good. You don't want to become a person who people roll their eyes at when they mention your name.

Things sometimes suck and we have all had those days but you know what? Make wine out of sour grapes. Call your best friend and bitch. Watch your favorite dvd and enjoy a quiet night. Go to the gym. Vent it on a blog and be done. Put the bullshit on the back burner. When you wake up the next day, it's a whole new ballgame. See your family.

After I overpaid for my stupid parking stickers yesterday, I was basically broke (thanks unemployment). I headed over to my Grandmas to take her and my little cousin to the church carnival opening night. We played games and headed to bingo. I was really nervous because I only had a few dollars left and after a round or two of paying for us, I was cashless.

And then I won Bingo. A few rounds later, I won again.

My Grandma says it because God knew I needed some help. Call it whatever you want but it came at just the right time. I wont $50 total and had money to pay for a bunch more games and whatnot and give them a great night.

So when people want to call me, email, invite me to lunch/dinner/hang out and ruin my meal with their negativity, please don't. I only have so much sympathy. Maybe if you didn't complain about every single thing I would actually feel bad for you. The over exaggeration of complaints needs to stop. Trust me, it's no wonder most of the top offenders I know are single.

Constant complainers, Negative Nancy's, Debbie Downers, Pessimist Pete's, I hate you.

Love,

Veronica

{Please note: I'm sure it sounds funny to some people that I would say, on a blog that's called "we hate you. love, us" that I hate negativity but it's true. There is a huge difference in making fun of things you don't like, laughing about it, and making light of bad situations. I mean it's obviously crazy to think that a person can not be annoyed or dislike things. So if I am going to hate, it's going to be funny, true, and that's that.}

{Also go vote for and follow LiLu and help her with challenge #4}

Shenanigans or how I hate fear and love the gym.

I hate fear. {Not the awesome movie with my love Mark Wahlburg (Nicole 4 eva)}but I hate being afraid.

A few years ago, I used to be afraid to go into a grocery store by myself. I hated shopping alone and going to the library. I always needed someone with me or I just wouldn't go. Go to the gym? Forget it. Have a movie date with myself? Not a chance. Eat alone in a restaurant? You must be kidding.

I walked my dogs today and I tried to figure out if I had always been afraid. Was it before or after dating a volatile bi polar bf who got too happy with his fists and had to be left? I know that during that time I was a completely different person and that I definitely couldn't do anything alone. I tried to remember my life before that and I know that I may have been less afraid of people but I was still extremely self conscious.

I hated my fear of being alone in public. Then I did something and took control of my life.

I surrounded myself with love. With my best friend. With people who wanted the best for me. I started loving myself and the last few years have been nothing short of amazing.

I sat in the pool today reading a book and relaxing after an hour workout with a personal trainer and I.felt.amazing. I swam laps for an hour yesterday and floated on my back in a pool of complete strangers and felt alive. I go anywhere I want and do what I want and even when I was scared to workout and perhaps fail at the exercises I didn't stop. I just shrugged it off and did what I had to do.

I mean Harry Potter had it right when what he feared the most was fear itself. So while he got his patronus, I got my self confidence back and we got rid of fear.

Without fear I have room to love alot of things.

I am currently loving:

Panera's lemonade, tuna salad on multi grain, and an apple for a side. When I feel like a good meal, I head on over with a book and have the most relaxing lunch/dinner. They post the calories so I know what I'm eating and it helps me make responsible choices.

Buying books from the library. Just picked up Water for Elephants, The Time Travelers Wife, and a bunch of Alice Hoffman novels in perfect condition. For a $1 I'm getting new books and helping the library. Seriously they put out a ton of new books by a ton of authors so it's a money saver and helpful at the same time.

Going to the gym. What?? Loving it? Why yes, I am. I love to sweat. I love seeing results and I love that I'm giving my body love. With Matt, Rachel, Steph, Alexa, and so many others getting in shape, it feels great knowing we're all trying to be healthy and feel good. I recently got a trainer and whileI might hate on her some days, I will pretty much hate how much I love her for helping me.

True Blood. {the link is to my fav fan site} I seriously can't get enough of this show. This week having Sookie say "Shut the fuck up", Eric's fantasy of them, Bill actually being sexy at the end, and the yumminess of Alcide plus Layfayette being all tough after Eric saves him. Awesome. Even better? Someone finally taping and shutting Tara's mouth up.

So at the end of the day, it's about learning and knowing who you are. I hate people who are rude to the customer service industry, don't say please and thank you, who leave a mess at restaurants and don't tip. I love my local librarians, my best friend, cool whip, horses, and pretty colored toe nails.

Life is about balance and finding what works.

xoxo

Veronica

What Up With...The Shakeweight

On Saturday night, I was all curled up watching bad television when I counted not one...not two...but three times where I saw a commercial for the Shake Weight and had to quickly change the channel. Now, not all infomercials bother me. In fact, I will admit that sometimes I'll get so drawn into one that I'll sit through the entire 30 minute presentation.

When I first saw a commercial for the Shake Weight, it made me laugh in an "isn't that silly" way. I also laughed because I have a dirty mind...you know what I mean. But as more time has gone on, I find myself saying "ok really, this is just ridiculous." And now there's Shake Weight for Men. Now I ask you: what up with that? Honestly, I don't get it. Is anyone really just sitting on their couch shaking this thing? Because I can think of several things I'd rather shake:

1) A metal shaker full of vodka, triple sec, cranberry juice, lime juice, and ice. Then I can burn the calories I'm about to consume in a delicious cosmopolitan.

2) A tambourine. In my dreams I'd like to flash back to the 60's and be a hot girl in a rock group standing on a pedestal in the back shaking a tambourine. Or like Madonna in her video for "Get Into the Groove".

3) My tailfeather...or bon bon...or groove thing...or rump.

Shake Weight commercial - I hate you.

Love,

Betty

Wedding Frustration

As you read this title, you may think "What?! Who hates weddings?" It would seem a little weird to hate them seeing that I had one. I should make it clear that I don't actually hate weddings. In fact, I'd say that I've enjoyed almost every wedding that I've gone to. As Veronica would say, "I love love" and I absolutely adore watching friends and families who are in amazing relationships get married. However, one thing that I get frustrated with are people who care more about "their wedding" than "getting married”.

When I got married, I would be lying if I said I wasn't excited to wear a pretty white dress and dance the night away or that I didn’t squeal when someone bought us our ice cream maker, but what really mattered to me was having my family and friends celebrate with us. Knowing how expensive weddings can be, we tried really hard to make it affordable for our guests. We held the wedding at the time when it would be cheapest to travel where we live. We blocked hotel rooms at several different priced hotels. We had a registry with gifts in all price ranges. Every RSVP that said "yes" was exciting and a surprise. I am really grateful when other friends and families do the same.

Now, I’d never tell someone how to throw their wedding. If you want to get married in Paris, that’s awesome and I’m sure it will be gorgeous. If you want to register for a $500 slow cooker, fantastic! I bet you’ll make some delicious lemon chicken in it and I’ll likely ask you for the recipe. However, I have trouble when people expect me to “find a way” to attend these weddings. And I really hate that I feel guilty when I don’t go.

I've noticed that this has become a trend among a lot of people that I know. In fact, one girl said "I want MY WEDDING to be what I WANT and I don't care, people HAVE to come. They will find the money and deal with it." Um...why should I have to "deal"? By "deal" with it, do you mean that I can skip your wedding and not buy a gift? Because I really don’t feel like getting a new credit card so I can go. Going to weddings can be expensive, I totally get it. However, I think that people sometimes forget that their wedding may not be the #1 priority to all of their guests.

Recently I was invited to a friend’s wedding. When I got the Save the Date card, I was all prepped to go. However, as I started looking into the details of the day, I was a bit...shocked. It's a destination wedding. There are no blocked hotel rooms and the cheapest room in the area is $250/night. Nothing on the registry is under $100. At the end of the day this wedding will cost me $1000. I hate admitting it, but as dollar signs were running through my head, I thought "I'm not going." And I’m scared to send back the RSVP card because I know she’s going to be pissed.

Maybe I should blame WEtv and Bridezillas...except that Bridezillas can be extremely entertaining.

Love,

Betty