Wednesday, June 2, 2010

My Boobs Trump Yours

Lately I've been reading a lot of posts about the horrors of bathing suit shopping. I get it - it's summer, it's time, and really who loves shopping for a bathing suit? But what's really irritating is reading about how people have such a tough time because their boobs are too big. Let me break it down: my boobs trump yours. I'm 95% confident in saying that. You're complaining because you're a D or DD? I'm a G...yes, you read that right. And no, I'm not a big gal - I'm a 34G. I'm also all natural (which leads me to this - those girls who get plastic surgery to be my size: Do your research. You will have back problems. It's not glamorous. You look silly. I hate you.)

The average bra size in the U.S. is a 36C. So if you're a D or DD, join the club of many girls who are a D because you're not that far off the average. You can still buy bras at Target, Victoria's Secret, etc. I have to order mine from specialty stores. You can easily find bras that are in pretty colors and fabrics. I'm lucky if I can find a bra that's not black, white, or nude. You can buy a bra for less than $80. I have to make massive alterations to all of my clothes to fit which often costs twice as much as the item of clothing. You can definitely find a bikini top that fits. Yea, you may have to look a little harder, but guess what - EVERYONE DOES. I don't feel bad for you.

And finally - how about you embrace what you have? Many girls will pay thousands of dollars to get what you have. You're a woman - boobs come with the territory. I'm sure you enjoy having that little something extra to make that sparkly halter top looks extra hot instead of having to wear a super enhancing padded bra. I hate you.




andygirl said...

I can safely say that I will never complain that my boobs are too big. they're a B on a good day, an A most other days. But, my ass is a size D (if asses wore bras), so I think I'm not remiss in complaining about bathing suit shopping. I want a nice, attractive, sexy one piece to wear, but you think I can find a one piece that fits my ass and my nonexistent tits? nopitty nope.

I feel for you though. your massive boobs must have the opposite problem. if you aren't a C cup, good luck finding bras and swimsuits. anyone not the norm gets screwed.

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